Letting go

Letting go does not mean that we forget what happened.  Letting go means that we no longer refeel the emotions attached to the memory.  As humans we have the capacity to remember everything that has every happened to us from the time we were born.  As a therapist, when someone tells me that they have no memories of their childhood, I wonder what trauma happened to them that they don’t remember.  If we fall and break our leg as a child, we should remember the fall and the fact that it hurt.  We should not refeel the pain of the break.  If we got blamed for something we did not do and were punished for it.  We should remember the event, the people involved and the fact that we were angry.  We should not be refeeling the anger.  We need to remember the bad as well as the good in our lives.  We need to remember the bad so we do not repeat the mistakes that were made,  either by others or by ourselves.  If we forget we are doomed to repeat them.  Letting go is not easy,  for me it is a process that does not happen overnight, or within a week.  Depending upon what I am trying to let go of, it may take me months to let go of it.  If it is something or someone dear to me it usually takes months, sometimes a year or more.  I know that I have truly let go when I can find humor in it.  If I am remembering it and able to find something humorous about it, then I have let go.  These video’s will help you to let go.  Link to the video’s.  Enjoy!

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dtoomey2015

I became a therapist in an attempt to understand my own childhood and what happened there and how it made me who I am, exhibiting the behaviors that were not always positive, very often self-destructive. I used Art Therapy to help me understand things in my past that were stopping me from making better decisions in my present day. I used Behavioral Science to help me understand underlying causal factors, roots to the present day behaviors that I was seeing in myself. Both help me to change those behaviors/thoughts that were causing me to make self-destructive decisions that were causing pain in life. I have been a therapist since 1985 and have an undergraduate degree Art and behavioral science (double major) from the University of Maine. My graduate work was done at Marywood university and I have a degree in Art Therapy. I have certificates in Forensic Interviewing and Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior therapy. I have 22 out of 30 credits toward a degree in Trauma Therapy from Drexel University. I started out as a Community Support Worker, Program Manager/Clinical Supervisor, Family therapist and Outpatient therapist.

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