Dying slowly

From the moment of birth we begin to die slowly, physically.  Emotionally and mentally we should be growing and learning and improving.  If you come from dysfunction that is not always the case.  The reason for that is because no one is teaching us  how to take the problems that come up in our lives and work them out so we can learn from them.  What you are being taught is how to blame others, circumstances or things for what has happened.  It is never your fault.  Unless you are a child, it is your fault for the mistakes that you make and the consequences that come from those mistakes.   It doesn’t make you a bad person, but it does make you responsible for what you’ve done and the consequences that have come from that mistake.  Owning up to your mistakes will require looking at why you need to blame others for your mistakes.  It is usually because that was what you were taught to do.  That is what your family of origin did, does.  In order to change any behavior it will take 3 weeks of catching yourself doing the old behavior and replacing it with the new behavior.  It will then take 3 more weeks of practicing that behavior until it becomes your habit.  The following link will help to relax you and allow you to give away what you have no control over so you can replace it with new behaviors that will help you to be happier

Here is the link

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dtoomey2015

I became a therapist in an attempt to understand my own childhood and what happened there and how it made me who I am, exhibiting the behaviors that were not always positive, very often self-destructive. I used Art Therapy to help me understand things in my past that were stopping me from making better decisions in my present day. I used Behavioral Science to help me understand underlying causal factors, roots to the present day behaviors that I was seeing in myself. Both help me to change those behaviors/thoughts that were causing me to make self-destructive decisions that were causing pain in life. I have been a therapist since 1985 and have an undergraduate degree Art and behavioral science (double major) from the University of Maine. My graduate work was done at Marywood university and I have a degree in Art Therapy. I have certificates in Forensic Interviewing and Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior therapy. I have 22 out of 30 credits toward a degree in Trauma Therapy from Drexel University. I started out as a Community Support Worker, Program Manager/Clinical Supervisor, Family therapist and Outpatient therapist.

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