Parental relationships

When you are a child, the responsibility for developing and keeping the relationship with your parent(s) is theirs.  As you grow into adulthood you learn the skills necessary to develop and keep relationships for yourself.  That includes the one you have with your parent(s).  It is no longer only their responsibility to keep the relationship going.  They should not be the only one that makes the contact with you.  They should not be the only one that tries to make plans to get together.  It is now yours as well. If you are not trying to keep the contact it will stop, like everything else.  If you do not make and keep the effort going it will stop.  Your priority should be in part your family.  No matter how good or bad they are, they are still your family.  Unless they are toxic to you, there is no other reason to not be in contact with them.  The effort should be mutual or the relationship will end because of the lack of  interest or effort on your part.  your parents will think that you are not interested in them and they will stop pushing themselves on you.  They will stop making the effort to keep the relationship going.  Relationships, no matter with whom, will end if not nurtured and mutual.   It takes both parties to either make it work or not.  Bad habits can creep in with children, thinking that your parents(s) have always made the effort and will always do so.  That is not the case and you will miss out on being a friend to your parents instead of being the child to them.  You will have to get rid of the old thoughts about your parents and build a new relationship with them to make this happen.  The following link will help ou get rid of the old and make room for the new.

Here is the link. Enjoy!

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Published by

dtoomey2015

I became a therapist in an attempt to understand my own childhood and what happened there and how it made me who I am, exhibiting the behaviors that were not always positive, very often self-destructive. I used Art Therapy to help me understand things in my past that were stopping me from making better decisions in my present day. I used Behavioral Science to help me understand underlying causal factors, roots to the present day behaviors that I was seeing in myself. Both help me to change those behaviors/thoughts that were causing me to make self-destructive decisions that were causing pain in life. I have been a therapist since 1985 and have an undergraduate degree Art and behavioral science (double major) from the University of Maine. My graduate work was done at Marywood university and I have a degree in Art Therapy. I have certificates in Forensic Interviewing and Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior therapy. I have 22 out of 30 credits toward a degree in Trauma Therapy from Drexel University. I started out as a Community Support Worker, Program Manager/Clinical Supervisor, Family therapist and Outpatient therapist.

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