Whenever we begin to compare ourselves to anything or anyone we have already defeated ourselves. The act of comparing ourselves means that we might be thinking that we are not okay or enough by ourselves. We are. None of us is perfect, all of us need work and change. Different kinds of changing, but changing nonetheless. The fact that we are comparing ourselves to anyone or anything should be telling us that we think we might be less then another or better then another. Someone has to lose in that scenario. Comparing yourself to who or what you were yesterday in an attempt to set goals for yourself to be better then yesterday is something to achieve. Comparing yourself to others is ego based and you will lose, often times feeling bad about yourself for no real reason. You will never be like another human being. You are unique by yourself and should be focusing your efforts on being a better you instead of being a better someone else. You are also wasting your time trying to be something you’re not, You both may be good at something but one of you will always be better then the other. You are also missing the other things you are capable of doing well. The things that make you unique. The reason you are here. Comparing yourself to others is another lack of confidence. It is another way of telling yourself you are not good enough the way you are. It is something that parents use sometimes to keep their children in line. It also destroys confidence in your ability to be you in all your uniqueness. Learning from what life gives us is a way of building confidence in our own abilities and strengths. We will never be able to live someone else’s life. We will never be able to live our own if we are trying to live someone else’s life. Comparing yourself to others and trying to out manivour them at their own lives is a waste of ours. We will never be able to do that. They will always win at their own lives and we will lose at ours. Being satisfied with who and what we are, attempting to make ourselves better is the only way we will win at our own lives. It is the only way we will ever be content and happy with ourselves. Giving away what is no longer working for us is the only way we will be able to learn about ourselves and what we need to do to make us better people. The following link will help you to do that.
I became a therapist in an attempt to understand my own childhood and what happened there and how it made me who I am, exhibiting the behaviors that were not always positive, very often self-destructive. I used Art Therapy to help me understand things in my past that were stopping me from making better decisions in my present day. I used Behavioral Science to help me understand underlying causal factors, roots to the present day behaviors that I was seeing in myself. Both help me to change those behaviors/thoughts that were causing me to make self-destructive decisions that were causing pain in life. I have been a therapist since 1985 and have an undergraduate degree Art and behavioral science (double major) from the University of Maine. My graduate work was done at Marywood university and I have a degree in Art Therapy. I have certificates in Forensic Interviewing and Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavior therapy. I have 22 out of 30 credits toward a degree in Trauma Therapy from Drexel University. I started out as a Community Support Worker, Program Manager/Clinical Supervisor, Family therapist and Outpatient therapist. View all posts by dtoomey2015